SNL Season 1 Episode 18 [1976)

When you set the time machine to 1976, it’s a pleasant buzz to come face to…face with Raquel Welch.

What…rather, who could sum up that time quite like her?

Her feathered hair.  Her overly-tanned (golden?) skin.  Her bellbottom jeans.

There’s something fizzy about the experience.

A starlet now faded.  A human sequin.

I previously wrote about Welch’s 1967 film Fathom.

Aside from base titillation, it’s a pretty lame affair.

But here on Saturday Night Live she gets to show a bit more of her talent.

Not much more.  A bit more.

For instance, Raquel sings on this episode.

The monologue-substitute with John Belushi as Joe Cocker is pretty fantastic.

It’s a comedy piece.

Later, Welch actually does share the rarefied air which Marilyn Monroe breathed when she sang “Happy Birthday” for JFK.

I’m speaking of Raquel’s rendition of the Gershwin tune “It Ain’t Necessarily So”.  Few microphone techniques can be said to carry such sexual import as Welch’s on this number.

And the subject matter…for God’s sake!

It ain’t Sportin’ Life from Porgy and Bess.

No.

It’s Raquel singing, “The things that you’re liable/to hear in the Bible”…[what a rhyme!]…”It ain’t necessarily so.”

So.  You get the picture.

Welch is steamy as a Manhattan manhole cover in winter.

One particularly great sequence involves Welch as Jane Russell on the set of The Outlaw (1943).  Dan Aykroyd plays Howard Hughes.  It is pretty priceless!

Aykroyd is also great in the sequence about applying the metric system to the English alphabet (the Decabet).

What’s bad about this great blast from the past?

Phoebe Snow.

I really don’t want to hate on this lady, but it’s a combination of snoozerville and overly-precious musicianship masquerading as talent.

Snow has that horribly indiscreet application of wide vibrato which always irks the bejesus out of me.

And the songs…for christsake!  “Two-Fisted Love”?!?  Are you fuckin’ kidding me?  How does an MOR artist do a song like “Two-Fisted Love” with a straight face.

And so Phoebe Snow is godawful here.  It bears mentioning because (for some [un]mysterious reason) she was back on the show for a second time [here] in season one.

But let’s dish some more.  John Sebastian also sucks on this episode.  Trying to cash in on his Welcome Back, Kotter theme song.

Likewise, somebody in charge of sound for this episode adds to the lameness of Sebastian’s performance.  Or, from another perspective, the only good thing about John Sebastian’s performance here is his microphone feeding back during his aborted intro.

Ok, there.  I’ve let them both have it.  Snow and Sebastian.

What else is good about this episode?

Let’s end on a high note.

Lorne Michaels’ solicitation of The Beatles (for a whopping $3000) is goddamned brilliant.

Ok.  So there you have it.  Oh…and Belushi as the high-strung meteorologist during Weekend Update is damned good as well.

Cheerio!

 

-PD

Fathom [1967)

Stay classy, San Diego.  That’s right…Raquel Welch was indeed a weather forecaster for KFMB in San Diego before she moved to Dallas, Texas in the early 60s.  She was a cocktail waitress at the Cabana Hotel:  the same hotel Jack Ruby visited (multiple times?) the night before J.F.K. was assassinated.

This is the sort of logic which strings together (like a lime-green bikini) the film Fathom.  For those unfamiliar with the visual presence of Welch, this is a good place to start.  Indeed, I feel sympathy for Serapkin (Clive Revill).  He stood no chance up against such an explosive honeypot as Fathom Harvill (Welch).

Ah, but there isn’t much substance here. I mean, this is really a forgettable film on many levels.  And so the best question then becomes, “Did Welch ever cross paths with Ruby or J.F.K.?”

Yes, this film is that bad.  Watching the portion with Welch in the green bikini on loop might be a solution.

So let’s return to the Babushka Lady.  Was it Beverly Oliver?  Carcano or Mauser?

“[Oswald] was employed by the CIA and was obviously drawn into a scapegoat situation and made to believe ultimately that he was penetrating the assassination. And then when the time came, they took the scapegoat—the man who thought he was working for the United States government—and killed him real quick. And then the machinery, disinformation machinery, started turning and they started making a villain out of a man who genuinely was probably a hero.”

–New Orleans D.A. Jim Garrison

And we all know this chestnut [or should]:

“On Wednesday, Nov. 20, 1963, an advertisement under “Club Activities” was published in the Dallas Morning News stating that George Bush, president, Zapata Off-Shore Co., would be speaking for the American Association of Oilwell Drilling contractors at 6:30 p.m., the next day at the Sheraton-Dallas Hotel.

The advertisement places George H. W. Bush in Dallas the day before JFK was assassinated; there is no public record indicating when Bush left Dallas on that trip.

Hoover’s warning

Further, an FBI memo written by J. Edgar Hoover on Nov. 29, 1963, advised that the FBI office in Miami warned the Department of State on Nov. 23, 1963, one day after the assassination, that “some misguided anti-Castro group might capitalize on the present situation and undertake an unauthorized raid against Cuba, believing that the assassination of President John F. Kennedy might herald a change in U.S. policy, which is not true.”

image: http://www.wnd.com/files/2013/09/JFK-photo-GEORGE-H-W-BUSH-cia-memo-1-256×300.jpg

In the last paragraph of the memo, Hoover noted that “Mr. George Bush of the Central Intelligence Agency” furnished the background information contained in the report. Spokesmen for George H.W. Bush have said the reference might be to a different George Bush.”

[credit to Jerome Corsi and World Net Daily]
Read more at http://www.wnd.com/2013/09/did-george-h-w-bush-witness-jfk-assassination/#UrCTKJ6hUSGkQzHC.99

Can you fathom that?  Fathom=six feet.  Under.
-PD