Rocky IV [1985)

America is in serious trouble.

The USA has no pride.

No cohesion.

The United States of America does not command respect from any nation on earth.

This process began to exponentially accelerate on 9/11/01.

That is when we entered the Age of Perpetual Lies.

Two wars.

Afghanistan.

Loss.

Iraq.

Lost before it even began.

You cannot predicate a “righteous war” upon a lie.

Two wars.

Two towers.

More lies.

Why do I love Russia?

Because they are not weak.

They are not spineless.

They are not a nation of ineffectual do-nothings.

And that is because of one great man.

Vladimir Putin.

There is a vacuum of power in the United States.

An absence of leadership.

We are a country drifting at sea.

A country who does not know who it is.

Or what it stands for.

A country perfectly divided.

Right down the middle.

Where one side cancels out the other.

This is not a check and balance.

It is a negation resulting in complete defeat.

America has no national spirit.

America’s reason for being has disappeared.

Along with the truth.

Who will save America?

You must save America.

It’s ok to love Russia.

It’s ok to love China.

Yes, I love China too.

Why?

Because they are on the righteous side of the war in Ukraine.

America is on the wrong side.

And I also love Palestine.

I’m sick of Donald Trump’s bullshit lies and politicking.

Even though I voted for him twice.

He has lied repeatedly about the COVID vaccines.

But even so, I support Trump in his legal battles.

Why?

Because he is being unfairly persecuted and punished.

But Trump is wrong about Israel.

Lindsey Graham is wrong about Iran.

I love Iran.

Because they stand with Russia.

And I love Syria.

Because they stand with Russia.

America continues to fight a pointless war.

IN SYRIA.

This is madness.

I support Palestine because they are the bastard children of the world.

They have no big press machine behind them.

Unlike the propaganda onslaught in favor of Israel.

Josh Hawley is wrong about Israel.

So wrong that it is embarassing.

Fox News is infinitely embarassing.

They have completely lost the ability to think as logical, rational human beings.

Whose interests are they serving?

And why?

Trump is wrong to politick off the war in Israel.

I don’t hate Israel.

I don’t hate Ukraine.

But I hate propaganda.

And I hate an unfair advantage.

Ukraine has had the advantage of a global propaganda machine behind it.

I detest that.

Israel always has the advantage of a global propaganda machine behind it.

And America fights for everyone but itself.

America is weak.

Porous.

Like Swiss cheese.

What can bring America together?

Not more lies.

No more lies.

No more noble lies.

RFK Jr. is right about the vaccines.

And MSNBC is actually right about Palestine and Israel.

America is on the point of total collapse.

The American military leadership is an embarassment.

Particularly Mark Milley.

His obstreperous James Comey pantomime is finally over.

He no longer has the office of CJCS to lend him any undue legitimacy.

I expect he will become much like John Brennan and Michael Hayden.

A complete detriment to the USA…even in retirement.

Does America have any good military leaders?

At all???

I like Michael Flynn.

That’s about it.

No one else has shown me anything impressive.

RFK Jr. is the best candidate to unite the country.

Trump may be the best candidate to save the country.

The American government is completely dysfunctional.

George W. Bush stole the 2000 election.

And Joe Biden stole the 2020 election.

Will your vote matter in 2024?

Do any votes matter?

Republicans lack a coherent strategy.

As dumb as Trump is (very fucking dumb!), he’s a fucking genius compared to ALL other Republican Presidential candidates.

Biden is as dumb as a potato.

And RFK Jr. will be boxed out everywhere he goes.

This is not a free system.

These are not “free and fair” elections.

This is a travesty.

Who will save America?

You must do it.

In your own way.

Whether big or small.

It’s ok to love and respect Russia.

It’s ok to say nice things about China.

It’s ok to root for Palestine.

It’s ok to sympathize with Iran and Syria.

Where is the American military?

We’ve seen the worst of the U.S. military (Milley).

Where’s the best?

Show yourselves.

-PD

SNL Season 1 Episode 13 [1976)

Peter Boyle had an unmistakable face.

The name might have been unfamiliar to most, but run that clip of “Puttin’ On the Ritz” from Young Frankenstein and you have a strange bit of film immortality.

Mr. Boyle was, of course, the tap-dancing Frankenstein monster who so gracefully delivered his one and only (repeated) singing line at sporadic intervals [“puttin’ on the riiiiiiiitttttzzzzzzz…”].

Irving Berlin, the song’s composer, published it barely more than a month after the stock market crash of 1929.  Aw hell…I don’t often do this, but it’s important you see this laugh-out-loud clip if you’re unfamiliar with the “super dooper” Mel Brooks moment:

Now then…

That’s Peter Boyle.  I suppose he had TWO lines in actuality.

Well, he’s here as the host of Saturday Night Live on Valentine’s Day 1976.

Ah, Valentine’s…or as the beautiful, genius Sophie Crumb (30 years later) called it “valentine-wanna-kill-myself-day!”  Yeah…

Sometimes it feels about like that.

So this episode of SNL has an occasionally sappy, lazy, wrist-slitting sentimentality to it.  Ok, I admit:  the Gary Weis film is cute.  But God…that Simon & Garfunkel music…  It’s such a tearjerker.

Really, it peeves me when SNL recycles footage.  I mean, hello!  We’re only 13 episodes into this thing.  First season!  Are they really out of material?  Hell, we’d seen ’em do it earlier with an Albert Brooks film.

At least the repeated faux commercials are usually funny.  And they’re tolerable because they’re 30 seconds long (I’m guessing) [give or take].

So, yeah…

This episode has some good parts.  Samurai Divorce Court is pretty good (mainly due to John Belushi and Jane Curtin).

Really, this episode is pretty strong until the back half.

Al Jarreau is surprisingly good as the musical guest.  I wasn’t really familiar with his stuff (just his name), but he really is a musical freak!  The guy really nails it on both of his performances…going from a simmering Valentine’s romantic tone to savant bebop scatting.

Wikipedia has a very sparse sketch of the events in this episode.

Some, admittedly, aren’t really worth mentioning.

The wrestling skit with The Bees and The W.A.S.P.s (white Anglo-Saxon Protestants) is pretty underwhelming.

Really, the most-improved (and continually improving) portion of the show was the Weekend Update with Chevy Chase.  The writing was pretty free and wild.  And think of all the great cultural references we get.

The description of Dorothy Hamill’s Olympic routine is frankly hilarious.  Also, by this time George H.W. Bush was director of the CIA.  One particularly funny question posed by the show’s writers was, “Is America a front for the CIA?”

Such humor evinces politically-aware writers.  We must remember that the Church Committee had just met the previous year (1975).  It was one of the few times (perhaps the only time) that the American intelligence community came under any sort of actual scrutiny by Congress (and, by extension, the American people).

CIA, NSA, FBI…no one was completely spared from this investigation occasioned by Watergate.

Which reminds me.  Perhaps the most classic bit in this episode is Dan Aykroyd doing a Nixon impersonation in a rubber monkey mask.  The surreal act of breathing (which causes the entire mask to be sucked in and, alternately, blown back out) perfectly sums up the bizarre nature of American politics at that time.

It was a time when Reagan was but a former “fascist” governor (and yet to be President).  Yes, Weekend Update uses the word “fascist”.  (!)  How far SNL has sunk now.

But, to be fair, SNL was projecting the humor of the American liberal movement.  At least that’s the impression I get.

One final note.  The trial of Patricia (Patty) Hearst was also big news about this time.  Obviously, her case captured national attention for quite a while.  [An earlier episode with Lily Tomlin involved a fictional sorority sister [Tomlin] writing a letter to the imprisoned Hearst while, in an aside, asking another sister to return her Carpenters records.  Ahh, the 70s…]

Perhaps the greatest coup of the episode under consideration is the montage of art photos which purport to be an “Artist Rendering” of the Hearst trial.  From Hieronymus Bosch’s The Garden of Earthly Delights to  Dalí’s La persistencia de la memoria, the effect is both highbrow and ridiculous.

And it is for nuggets just such as these that we continue to be enthralled with America’s most storied variety show.

 

-PD