interview by Gutterball Wales
San Antonio, Texas is home to one of the rarest musicians in America: Pauly Deathwish. He’s a musician who defies categorization, so much so that Spotify fails in its attempts to label him with any remote accuracy. Deathwish brings experimental music and subjects for songs to their breaking point, almost recalibrating the concept of novelty altogether. One might say that he’s a sort of collage of avant-garde movements pasted onto a collage of more avant-garde movements until they all sort of blur into an ocean of weird. I’ve known Deathwish since 2001, and he’s only getting stranger.
How often do you write songs?
On average, I write a song a day. Sometimes I record an entire album–10 plus songs–in a single night.
That’s like Lope de Vega, who was said to write a play a day. How many albums have you written in your career?
I’ve released 59 albums since April of 2021. During that time period, I’ve also released 25 EPs and 25 maxi singles—936 songs in total so far.
That’s almost unfathomable. Do you know if that’s the record? Will you contact the Guinness Book?
I’m not sure if that’s the record. I know the band Psychic TV holds some kind of Guinness record like that, but I may have broken it. Likewise, artists such as Merzbow may have me beaten in terms of sheer volume of music released during such a period of time (a little over two years).
What are your accomplishments in the music industry?
Well, I have toured and recorded as a bassist with the hard rock band Young Heart Attack. I have toured and recorded as a drummer with the Grammy-winning Cajun band Lost Bayou Ramblers. As a keyboard player (piano and organ), I was featured on the UK top-40 album Revival by The Answer, a band from Northern Ireland.
I’ve recorded with Clem Burke (Blondie), Scarlett Johansson, Nora Arnezeder, Gordon Gano (Violent Femmes), Dr. John, Hunt Sales (Iggy Pop), Tony Scalzo (Fastball), and others.
I’m particularly proud of my string arrangement on the …And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead album IX.
How do you go about writing your songs? Do they come about spontaneously or does a lot of planning take place?
Well, I like to write fast. If the process takes too long, I find it can kill the energy of the piece. But I do quite a bit of planning to allow myself to work fast. I set loose parameters, usually by choosing a genre and/or concept for an album. In terms of genre and concept, I will give an example.
I have an album called AaWxEiSsOoMfE which is a traditional country album. That’s the genre. The concept (twist) is this: all the songs are about authoritarian dictators and entities. The songs are written in glowing praise of these despots. This concept interests me because it is highly-unlikely that Nashville would ever produce music with this point of view.
Some of my works are composed in minutes. Others take a week or more. But I am usually three months ahead on music to be released. I always have a backlog—a stable of releases—to be rolled out in the near-future. In this respect I identify with one of my great heroes: Jandek. To paraphrase him, “If I don’t come out with another release soon, I’m afraid I’ll fall into obscurity.”
Tell us how a new song forms in your head?
I wrote many of my first songs from a place of personal pain. I got dumped by text message by my fiancée after a four year relationship. So many of those songs on my early albums are cathartic.
But now I tend to write as if I’m doing conceptual art. I write with the album in mind. I now usually write ten to 15 songs at a time. At least ten songs per album. I particularly enjoy playing with juxtaposition…and pushing the limits of what free speech can be in America. The songs are linked by genre and a unified concept. The main principle often at play is absurdity.
The idea is to make the musical style (and idiomatic conventions of that style) and lyrics clash in a massive disconnect. But sometimes it’s just playful. For instance, yesterday I completed the bulk of a rap album where the music is atonal serialism, like Arnold Schoenberg. It’s absurd. It appeals to me because I’m fairly certain that that combination has never been tried in earnest.
The experimentation into the unknown reminds me of James Joyce, both in Ulysses and in Finnegans Wake. Do you do a lot of editing?
I love Finnegans Wake, but Ulysses is too normal for me. As far as editing, I am very inspired by the filmmaker Jean-Luc Godard—particularly his magnum opus Histoire(s) du cinéma. I do edit, but in a “creative destruction” sort of way. I routinely delete random parts from my songs. I try to let chance play as big of a role as it played in the music of John Cage. I also use some apps which act as generators of musical randomness. I admire the cut-up technique of Tristan Tzara as well.
So how might you best be described as a musician?
Exceedingly-diverse. My releases have spanned the following genres (so far): alternative, indie rock, folk, dance, techno, emo, instrumental, college rock, classical, avant-garde, minimalism, jazz, avant-garde jazz, rock, psychedelic, prog-rock, art rock, Brazilian, bossa nova, punk, easy listening, Britpop, holiday, Halloween, goth rock, fitness & workout, French pop, J-pop, classical crossover, reggae, dub, indie pop, Latin, alternative & rock in Spanish, Christian & gospel, gospel, smooth jazz, Arabic, North African, grunge, house, country, Americana, world, Russian chanson, German pop, Russian, blues, delta blues, traditional gospel, R&B/soul, disco, hip-hop/rap, alternative rap, singer-songwriter, traditional folk, underground rap, electronic, dubstep, Indian, Hindustani classical, pop, oldies, comedy, novelty, IDM/experimental, jungle/drum’n’bass, ambient, rockabilly, alternative folk, Korean, funk, Bollywood, bop, contemporary R&B, old school rap, South America, traditional country, Tex-Mex, country blues, opera, hard rock, Chicago blues, regional Mexicano, pop punk, metal, Europe, electronica, Celtic, new age, meditation, Carnatic classical, Sufi, flamenco, ghazals, devotional & spiritual, rock & roll, standup comedy, glam rock, Dixieland, impressionist, cool jazz, adult contemporary, piano, soft rock, and blues-rock.
That’s quite the range! Why should other musicians listen to you?
Because I cover subjects others don’t. I am like a news wire service. And though I am unabashedly-biased, I actually cite my sources in my songs.
Subjects which I have covered: government repression in the PRC, COVID vaccines, COVID therapeutics, Trump’s vaccine stance, Klaus Schwab, COVID lockdowns, vaccine passports, populist protests, BLM/Antifa protests, Anthony Fauci, Vladimir Putin, war in Ukraine, the World Economic Forum, NATO, Russia, Zelensky, neo-Naziism in Ukraine, the Azov Battalion/Regiment, CIA, U.S. State Department, Donald Trump, the 2020 election, school shootings, Joe Biden, monkeypox, inflation, the People’s Republic of China, Xi Jinping, nuclear weapons in India, food shortages, abortion, American family values, serial killers, Pakistan, Imran Khan, India, Narendra Modi, redneck culture, the FBI, Merrick Garland, Mao Zedong, North Korea, Iran, Syria, Palestine, communism, capitalism, Venezuela, Türkiye, Erdoğan, QAnon, psychological warfare, information warfare, Kanye West, Alex Jones, Elon Musk, conservative values, Event 201, COVID origins, American teen slang, performance art, big pharma, vaccine adverse events and reactions, Chinese balloons, white supremacy, etc.
That litany is rather inclusive in describing the territory I have covered. My approach is this: about half my music is parody, and the other half is dead-serious. Like Andy Kaufman’s audience, it is up to my audience to try and figure out when I am (and am not) being serious. Frankly, I can’t even tell anymore when I am being serious. I suppose that makes me a terminal hipster.
Frankly, I thrive on being controversial. I am, perhaps, the musical equivalent of Sacha Baron-Cohen.
I think because my music is constantly experimental, it touches on many approaches which can be further exploited by other musicians. I would be honored if a musician were to “piggy-back” onto one of my concepts. I love finding music which inspires me to elaborate on the aesthetic which the writer delineated.
Why do you think other musicians don’t cover these subjects?
Most musicians spend years on an album. If it is topical–like a folk song,–their topical songs will likely be outdated by the time the album finally comes out.
The other reason is that covering such controversial topics is not without its pitfalls. All my music–even love songs– has been banned by YouTube Music. They are the only major streaming service which has banned any of my music, as far as I am aware.
The first song of mine which I noticed that YouTube had banned was “Crimes Against Humanity”. It is a song which is critical of the three COVID vaccines which were available in the USA. Not long after banning that song, my entire body of work was banned by YouTube Music. I received no notice on the reason for its removal.
Likewise, my political positions and revolutionary approach has gotten me banned by Donald Trump’s Truth Social and, just recently, by Elon Musk’s Twitter. Additionally, I had an advertisement rejected by Rumble (apparently because my website [www.paulydeathwish.com] is not “age appropriate”).
I presume the reason I was banned from Truth Social (after a mere three days) was that I questioned Trump regarding his vaccine stance. Twitter at least gave me a vague, Kafkaesque reason for my permanent suspension (something about “platform manipulation”). It find it painfully-humorous because I only had two followers at the time of my suspension. If I was manipulating the platform, then I evidently wasn’t doing a very good job of it.
Having been rejected by Truth Social, X, and Rumble certainly makes me more open-minded about liberalism. In the case of Rumble, I got the feeling that my advertising money was rejected because I wasn’t conservative enough for them. However, having been censored by YouTube (Google [Alphabet Inc.]) has soured me on the leftist authoritarianism that prevails in Silicon Valley. I suppose getting banned so much is making me a sort of libertarian. Or perhaps an extreme moderate. I’m sick of both closed-minded, insular, holier-than-thou conservatism as well as the current leftist fascistic tendencies that can be evinced by a liberalism which pressures social media companies to remove “misinformation” all while prosecuting political opponents (Trump’s four indictments are strikingly-similar to the treatment of Bolsonaro and Imran Khan in Brazil and Pakistan [respectively]).
I think musicians avoid these topics for exactly this reason. When major media companies start banning you, you have no way to promote your music. Suffice it to say that this has engendered great disgust inside me for Alphabet Inc. (Google), Donald Trump, and Elon Musk.
So would you identify as a political musician or are most of your songs non-political?
I am very much a political musician. I get this from Jean-Luc Godard, but also from Guy Debord.
From Godard I get the concept that artists have a responsibility to use their reach to speak truth to power.
From Ralph Waldo Emerson, I get the impetus to, and I paraphrase, “speak in strong words today and speak in strong words tomorrow, even if it contradicts everything you said yesterday”.
That being said, I am not necessarily writing music for conservatives, though I have identified as one the past few years. Likewise, I am not writing music which is opposed to liberalism. I do not see liberalism as my enemy.
In my youth I was a liberal. For quite some time I have been a conservative. I credit RFK Jr. with opening my heart once again to liberalism. He is the only politician on either side of the aisle in the present age on the American stage whom I respect whatsoever.
What kind of musical upbringing did you have?
Well, I was born in San Antonio, Texas on December 14, 1976. I played piano by ear as a child, but I did not have the discipline to take piano lessons until I was in college.
I played a bit of violin as a child (poorly), but it wasn’t until age 12 that I really threw myself into music (although I loved my cassette of Sousa marches as a kid). I started on the drums. I played in school band from age 12 to 23.
I taught myself guitar at age 15. I taught myself piano at age 18. I taught myself bass guitar in my 30s.
Most of my instruction has been in percussion. I studied percussion and music composition with Hsueh-Yung Shen at Southwestern University where I earned a BM in music theory.
I also studied music composition briefly with Russell Riepe at Texas State University. I did not finish my Master’s in music composition because I became immersed in the rock and roll and studio recording scene of Austin, TX, though I did earn my MBA at age 39.
My passion for music really blossomed in high school. I was the principal percussionist in the Texas All-State Orchestra my last year of high school.
But the musicians I learned the most from—the most intelligent musical minds with whom I crossed paths—were the previously-mentioned Dr. Shen (a classical composer) and Frenchie Smith (a psychedelic rock producer).
Do you have other interests outside of music that play a role in your music?
Yes, definitely. I am very interested in cinema. Mainly classic Hollywood and foreign films, particularly French cinema. I’m also a bit of a news junkie. So I would say I have a fairly large interest in geopolitics.
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In what way does French cinema work its way into your music?
The French New Wave–Nouvelle Vague–was a radical rethinking of film language. In particular, they loved “exploding” the constraints of genre. They worked loosely within genre conventions, but subverted those conventions. They were such scholars on film–particularly Godard and Truffaut–that they knew the “rules” intimately.
This is what I try to do with my music. As the adage goes, “you have to know the rules in order to break the rules”. What the Nouvelle Vague did with genres such as the musical, the gangster film, the Western…is what I try to do with musical genres such as classical, jazz, and rock and roll.
If one was to be introduced to your work, what are some songs that you think would most hook new listeners in?
If I were to pick ten of my songs as a sort of sampler for the general listener, I would go with:
“No More Shall They Weep”
“Makes Me Wanna Stay in Bed”
“Riding a Horse That Barks”
“Fucked-Up”
“Daisies on Your Doorstep”
“Exit Music for a John Hughes Film”
“Opium Din”
“Form Follows Function”
“Leather Pants and a Tambourine”
“Let’s Go Into Town and Rent a Movie”
These are all non-political songs (as non-political as I get). Most are from my early albums. Although these 10 do serve as a fairly-representative survey of my musical style and sound. It should be noted, however, that these songs are also quite tame compared to the musical experimentation present in much of my music.
Could you give three or so examples of your experimental music that isn’t tame?
Absolutely. Three representative experimental pieces:
“Second Viennese Discotheque” combines the art rock of David Bowie (circa his album Low) with the atonality of composers like Alban Berg and Anton Webern. It is the type of house music which would probably clear the dance floor–and the entire club–due to its dissonance.
“Lukashenko Won Fair and Square Just Like Biden” is probably the only country and western song ever written about Belarus. It is a political song. Some will find it funny. Some will find it insulting. It is philosophically-experimental in that it illustrates a possible double-standard at work in the ethics of Western European countries. But the logical riddle is presented mostly without judgment. It can be interpreted in at least a couple of ways. Although it is not a mean-spirited song, some will find the comparison to be tasteless.
“Catullus 16” is a setting of a particularly-explicit poem by the poet Catullus to saccharine strains that would not be out of place on an Elton John record. If the listener does not know Latin, as most don’t, the piece presents no problem whatsoever. Sure, the lyrics are unintelligible, but it just sounds like a pretty, heartfelt song. However, if one were to follow along while seeing the words in their own language, they would find that the musical setting is not at all appropriate for this pornographic, sadistic text (or vice versa). What is the meaning of this experiment? I leave that up to the listener.
Do you have any plans or desire to perform your music live?
I don’t have any specific plans to perform live. Indeed, although I have played many shows in my life, I have never played a solo show as Pauly Deathwish.
I would very much like to play some shows. Although I do have physical and mental health issues which would make traveling and performing difficult for me.
I hope to someday do some Pauly Deathwish shows. It would be a great honor for me.
If it isn’t too personal, what kind of physical and mental health issues do you have?
I have high blood pressure, tachycardia, high cholesterol, asthma, a multitude of allergies to airborne substances, general anxiety disorder, and insomnia.
The anxiety is probably the hardest to deal with. I am not afraid to play concerts. I’m more like Bill Murray in What About Bob?—I’m afraid to walk out the door, afraid of driving, afraid of flying, etc. etc. ad nauseam.
I have panic attacks every day. They severely limit my range of activities. Likewise, my asthma is bad enough that singing can prove quite challenging for me.
But I am not giving up hope. I am always working to try and get healthier. I dealt successfully with alcohol and drug addiction this past year.
So I am learning to realize that what seems miraculous can actually happen. I hope I do get to perform again. It has been about a decade since my last musical performance.
What role does novelty and relatability play in your music? Why should listeners value unrelatability?
Well, I would certainly categorize myself as an outsider musician or outsider artist. I realize that I am weird. And in this weirdness is probably a pretty huge helping of originality and novelty.
It is quite likely that mainstream listeners will be turned off by much of my music. That’s ok. It doesn’t make me feel bad.
As you might be able to tell from my creative space here, I am probably not going to be a “relatable” voice to many people.
But I like how you asked that question, so I would just say this: whether they’re laughing at me, or laughing with me, at least they’re laughing. And listening!
I relate to people like Sun Ra – a guy from Alabama who swears he was taken by aliens to Saturn. I absolutely don’t care whether people like my music or not. I don’t give a thought to my audience when I’m writing—because at this point, I have no audience.
The value of my unrelatable œuvre is its almost total disregard for every artistic convention. So I would say that my music is an oddball prayer and plea. I admire people who have the exact opposite political opinions as me. And I admire artists whose aesthetic is the antithesis of mine.
The value of my work is as a barometer. If you listen and you think it’s groovy, you too are a weirdo. Congratulations, comrade. If you listen and find the music and lyrics to be strange, then you probably have a job and a family and a car and a mortgage. I envy you. Sometimes. And perhaps listening to my bizarro music can spark within you an idea of how to improve upon your life (if even in some small way) through creativity and ingenuity.
Ultimately, what do you hope to accomplish with your music?
Ultimately, I would like to make enough money from my music to be able to eat something other than Alpo for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
I’ve put out over 50 albums and my total income last year was about equal to the median income for the poorest country on Earth in terms of per capita GDP: the Democratic Republic of Congo.
I can take a lot. I can endure a lot. Even with all my physical and mental frailties. I have no delusions of grandeur regarding richness. I don’t have some dream car picked out. I will probably never buy a car. And I will probably never buy a house. And if I am ever to get married, the woman will have to be a saintly creature who understands that I probably wasn’t ever destined for a comfortable life.
But all that talk about the bare necessities aside, I am at heart a rebel. I am the worst nightmare for those who would try and thwart my drive. The other day, I made an entire album of Chinese reggae in my sleep. Literally. I don’t sleepwalk. I make entire albums in my sleep, at least in the case of that project.
When I go to bed at night, I usually spend hours researching music. I don’t count sheep. Instead, I mentally scan the globe and think about where all the great musicians were from.
Alaska down to Washington—Hendrix, Nirvana, and The Sonics—down to Portland—The Kingsmen (“Louie Louie”)—to San Francisco with the 13th Floor Elevators and Doug Sahm (not to mention the Jefferson Airplane [Skip Spence] and the Grateful Dead)—down to L.A. with “Wild Man” Fischer and Frank Zappa (and The Beach Boys [Brian Wilson] and The Byrds)…into the desert with Captain Beefheart…over to Arizona for Sun City Girls and Charles Mingus…to New Mexico for John Denver…up to Denver for Apples in Stereo…back up to Idaho for Built to Spill…down to Oklahoma for The Flaming Lips and Woody Guthrie and Chet Baker…and into the secret homeland of weirdo geniuses: Texas—from Roky Erickson in Austin to Jandek in Houston—back to Austin for Daniel Johnston…and down to my hometown of San Antone for Butthole Surfers, “Blue” Gene Tyranny, and George “Bongo Joe” Coleman…while not forgetting the Legendary Stardust Cowboy up in Lubbock.
That’s how my mind works. This is what keeps me up at night. Where do I fit in? What hasn’t been done? What taboo can I break next?
July 21, 2023
contact: desertersongs@yahoo.com
paulydeathwish 